Monday, July 19, 2010

Knoxville Shmoxville

The view from the hotel room that was the site of the night from hell.

We hit the road last Monday on our quest to visit family and make our first family trip to the Magic Kingdom. Let me tell you two days in a car with a toddler is a crazy as it sounds.  The smile I was faking while talking about the drive in the past month was just that, fake.   It was wishful thinking.  I thought the fake smile may in some way rub off on Miss Thing and she'd turn into a magical, pleasant, never throw a tantrum kind of a toddler.  Fake smiles don't work ladies, move on. 
Six hours is the absolute threshold for pleasantness in a car for Miss Icie.  We pushed her to nine each day.  Our first stop was Knoxville Tennessee.  We had reservations for a nice hotel in the downtown area.  We had already decided to use the valet since it was only one night and two dollars extra.  I know you are probably wondering, why the hell is she telling me about stupid valet parking? It's an important detail, simmer down.  We unloaded our overnight bags and in my haste I left the GPS attached to the window. I never do that.  We settled into our room, ate dinner, took a swim, and tried to burn off Miss Thing's pent up energy.  Dave ran down to the car around eight, and grabbed a few things.  The car was fine, Icie's blanket and our Ipods were retrieved for charging.  The GPS was again forgotten. 
Icie fought sleep, bags were forming under her eyes.  Sometime between ten and eleven Miss Thing began one of the most horrible meltdowns in history.  A meltdown so monumental that the hotel staff actual knocked on our door and asked if they could assist us, mortifying.  We decided that no one was going to get any rest.  We were going to drive through the night and take turns sleeping.  Icie would probably sleep once the car started moving.  Dave and I would take turns driving and sleeping and by morning we would be in Florida.  I figured we could nap in the morning while Dave's mom played with Icie. 
We went to the lobby, exhausted and defeated and handed in our valet slip.  The hotel staff felt bad for us and waived our room charge, only charging us for our dinner and parking.  We went outside to stand and wait for our car.  They brought up the wrong car.  Then, the night clerk recruited the security guard to assist him so we would have to wait twice as long  while he reparked the wrong car and retrieved our car.  The security guard returned, with no car.
"I hate to make your night any worse but your car was busted into and the cops are on the way" Dave spent the next two hours dealing with insurance and the police while Icie and I headed back up to our room. Our GPS hanging on the window and our out of state plate were apparently too much for some thief to resist. Two other cars were also hit. I tried to wear Icie down.  Around one in the morning Dave came back Icie finally gave in and laid down.  We were resigned to the fact that were stuck in Knoxville until our window could be replaced.  Luckily we were able to get back on the road the by lunch time and my cries of "I wanna go home" had subsided.  It was however how this became our most expensive souvenir.


  1. Ok, holy shit, that is one hell of a night! Bless your heart for living through it and still be able to "relive" it in the form of a blog post.

    Six hours, eh? I'll keep that in mind next time we hit the road. Sounds like you all were troopers deserving of a few medals - especially you, Mama.

    Damn thieves!

  2. oh. my. damn.
    you deserve a spa day.


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